You know that movie "Mean Girls". I think they ought to make one called "Mean Moms" cause damn, they're everywhere!!! I'm a mom (last time I checked they were still alive) and I really look forward to my mom friends. I love feeling like I'm not the only one in this crazy job. When I'm in the store and hear a mom screaming at her kid I think to myself, "whew, thank GOD it's not just me that does that". I'll purposely make eye contact with her and give her the "been there, girl" look! Just so she knows that she's not alone either. There's a feeling of understanding and acceptance that only us moms can give to each other. When I find a mom who doesn't do everything perfectly I breathe a sigh of relief and put her number in my speed dial. This job is super tough. I try my very best everyday to be loving, patient, understanding and fun. Most days I succeed, some days I struggle and a few days I completely fail!
Why do some moms feel the need to be judgmental and competitive?? What could you possibly gain from it?? I say either they are so completely insecure about themselves and ability to mother or they have nothing else to do. I know I'm not perfect but I'm doing my best and am happy with that and I definitely don't have time to be worried about what other moms are doing. I'm too busy picking the gum out of my hair and realizing I'm wearing mismatched shoes!
I love to socialize with other mom's who are in the daily grind. Most are exactly what I would expect, great moms doing their best who are sweet and welcoming. Yay, new friends. But there's always that select few who usually have their own clique and have a special way of being kill joys. OY! They get a thrill in making nasty little remarks, comparing kids and talking themselves up.
They're at the supermarket giving me dirty judgmental looks while I struggle with my 3 monkeys. They're at the library reading extra loud to their kids so everyone can hear how great they are and giving smug glances at us slacker moms who come to socialize instead of giving a lesson on "the states of the union". They're at the mall at the children's play area hovering over their kids and trying to keep their kids from getting too close to another child for fear that evil germs will invade their child's pristine yet booger infested nose. They are in groups at the playground trying to ignore everyone else who so clearly is not as good a mother as they are.
I hear 'em talking. Yeah, it may seem like I'm oblivious to you, but I'm paying attention! "I can't believe she would let her kid wear his pajamas at 2 in the afternoon, I mean, don't you care enough about your kid to dress him for goodness sake!" Yes, I care but it's not a big enough issue for me. Who gives a rat's ass if he wears his Lightning McQueen pajamas to the playground?? I'm not fighting an obsessed 2 year old. What difference does it makes that Birdie dressed herself in a purple sweater and green shorts in the middle of summer? She thinks that she looks good and is proud that she dressed herself. Baby Bear may have cheerios permanently stuck to her butt...but again, she's as happy as can be.
Mothers who stay home, mothers who work at home, mothers who work outside the home, white, black, brown, purple and green, big, small, short, tall, old, less old, married, not married...and on an on....It doesn't matter. We are all connected in the most blessed and wonderful way possible, we have kids. We all understand that incredible love we feel for our children and SHOULD understand that most of us are doing the very best we can. So if you're a mom and agree with me, *high five to you*!. If you are a mom who is wondering where my kids are while I'm typing this (outside playing with knives, I think?) get over yourself. Next time you're out and see a mom who is clearly having a bad day tell her "I know it's tough, but you're doing a great job." It'll make her day and god knows, she needs it!