Yesterday I took a little jaunt to some outlet stores. Shari had been telling me about them for a long time but I kept thinking it was too far of a drive. You see, that's what happens when you move to a state the size of Connecticut; suddenly any car ride that takes over 15 minutes is considered a "long drive".
When I lived in Oklahoma it wasn't uncommon to drive 4 hours just to go shopping. Everywhere I went took forever and a day! But now? Well, if I can't be there in under 15 minutes I don't bother! Not to mention that I am directionally incompetent. I can barely find my way home from the supermarket! In my world, sending me on an excursion to a store I've never been to is akin to dropping me on planet Mars and telling me to find water. It's gonna be ugly. And I'm going to die of thirst before I get there.
Turns out, it's only a 35 minute drive to these outlets and while that still seemed like quite a hike, I was willing to put in the time in the efforts of saving money. You see, The Children's Place outlet has these incredible discounts for kids clothes and the temptation was just too great.
Plus, Howie got me this nifty little gadget for Christmas: a GPS system. I didn't use it for the first few months because I tried it once and the guy, "Tom", gave me the wrong directions and I ended up somewhere in bum fuck, Connecticut. I didn't trust "Tom" after that. He didn't make a good first impression and anyway, I like to play hard to get.
But he's been growing on me lately and so I decided to ask Tom for his help in finding the outlets. He did a great job. So much so that I think I now have a crush on him. He kind of has a sexy voice when he says things like, "in 400 yards, turn right" or "you have reached your destination."
Actually, I think he's kind of flirting with me because at one point I swore he said, "Licha, what are you wearing?". But when I gasped and looked in his direction he changed his tune, cleared his throat and said, "keep left."
I think Howie may regret getting me involved with Tom because now I can't see needing Howie's help at all when I'm behind the wheel. Not now that I have "Tom." And seeing as how it's always been Howie's job to tell me where I'm going, I can't see how there won't be any jealousy on his part.
He probably won't care. Because he knows I still need him to help me turn on my cell phone and use the remote control!